Take a Break

 I can't believe that its the end of August already. British summer has been a washout on the whole although we have had one or two 'hot days'. Most years we would have been able to have quite a few family barbeques but to date, we have had only two. Unfortunately our garden table and parasol has remained underneath its rain cover. Now the darker nights are drawing in and the temperature is on the down turn. Our plans to get out and about have not materialised as we had hoped.

Our main holiday this year will be in December to celebrate my 60th birthday, so we decided to take a short break in the meantime. This was not an easy task! We were looking for a place where my husband could fish, somewhere near the sea and within reach of interesting places to visit. To find a lake or pond near a beach is not easy but we eventually found a few. However on two of the sites the agents didn't bother to return our phone call, some where displayed as available and when attempting to book, they were full and another had massive hidden charges. I was beginning to wonder if we were not meant to have a short holiday at all.

Perserverence is the key and we have finally been able to book that elusive short break of 4 days which has all our requirements. If it rains again, we are prepared with a big umbrella, wellies and a list of indoor activities. My husband can fish to his heart's content and I have a portable easel and oil paints. We are so easily pleased!

Lets hope that we won't be carrying a rain umbrella, but sitting in the shade of a parasol.

Change For The Better

I follow a blog written by an old friend, also called Sue. She was my best friend when I was a teenager and in her early years of marriage, she emigrated to South Africa. I lost touch with her for a number of years and only recently have been able to catch up with her family. She writes of her upcoming 60th birthday and having to make a decision on whether to retire or not. Many of my friends have either retired or are nearing to retirement and most of them welcome this stage in life, but as I read Sue's blog, I realise that for some, retirement can be daunting.

 I retired early, nearly one year ago now and I looked forward to retirement and counted down the days. Sue writes of her indecision and expectation that life may be empty and not a change for the better. What a big difference in our expectations as I see retirement as enjoyment, freedom from schedules and rules and a chance to develop in any area I choose, whereas Sue is left wondering about her future prospects. Of course, a major factor in retirement is finance and I am lucky to be OK at the moment and I have no idea if Sue has a pension or what the retirement rules are in South Africa.

Any major change in life can be daunting and change can force you to re examine your role. Change that alters the definition of yourself, and how you are defined by others. Change that can affect your self worth if employment has been a major part of your life. I went through a phase where I wasn't sure of my new role as I had always been the career woman, the working full time mother, the manager, the shaper etc, etc. Then I realised that I no longer wanted nor needed these titles or definitions, I love the freedom of not working, I don't want to play by working rules and schedules  anymore.

My future is in my hands, I can do or not do, I can be defined by titles or not, I don't need the labels anymore as I am content in my new phase. I have enough at the moment to keep me occupied and if and when I need to change again, then that too is my choice. I may even be tempted to join one of the volunteer schemes that the government is to set up for the increased number of people who have or are about to retire! My world is in my hands now.





Future generations may not have a choice to retire, so I say to Sue and others who are undecided, embrace the change, develop new pathways, take a chance to explore the real you.

Ode to the Spoken Word

English language is constantly changing and evolving and I often say a word or phrase of which my children have never heard. For example, my grandson ‘petered the ball’ or knocked it over the fence. There are a few phrases that I dislike such as ‘pull your socks up’, ‘stiff upper lip’, ‘warts and all’, and ‘multicultural society’. If people need to ‘pull their socks up’ then they are in need of help and I’m sure that if they could move on, they certainly would. A better phrase would be to ‘let me help you to pull your socks up’. Similarly, why should we show a ‘stiff upper lip’. Britians are reared to conceal emotions, which is utter rubbish. This results in suppressed anxiety and stress which inevitably affects the physical body sometime in life. I have seen this result time and time again in the stress and anxiety courses that I ran, particularly in men, so please, get rid of that upper lip syndrome and learn to express thoughts and feelings.

‘Warts and all’ is an old Catholic phrase that speaks of God’s unconditional love, but it points to the fact that most people do not accept the ‘warts’ as society strives for perfection with plastic surgery and botox. ‘Multicultural society’ is often used to depict the changing society of Britiain, but we are a long way towards actual integration which should be hand in hand with multiculturalism. We may have many cultures but there is still a tendency to stay within that culture and I fear that I will not witness true integration within my lifetime.

Life is full of ‘would’ve’, ‘could’ve’ and ‘should’ve’. When you imagine all the different paths that result from a single decision or course of action, it can be mind boggling. I have umpteen ‘would’ve’, ‘could’ve’ and ‘should’ves’ over the course of my lifetime but equally as many ‘did do’, so I suppose I acted  with the help of experience and learnt judgements. The ‘what if’ in life can be a disastrous thought and should only be used to learn and then to move on.  A ‘what if’ has never happened but sometimes we act as if it has. Perhaps it should be banned from the English language. 

So I will take my warts and all and walk out into my multicultural society, keeping a stiff upper lip against our typical British weather and hope that I don’t need to pull my socks up, otherwise I will be thinking about what I should’ve done and what if I hadn’t done something. Maybe I should curl up with a good book (or kindle) instead!

Olympics Inspire a Generation

The Olympics are in full swing and Great Britain is winning loads of medals. If you compare our small country to the larger countries of USA and China, then, per population, we are actually doing much better than either of these countries.

The cheering and roar of the crowd is amazing, not just for our own athletes but also for other competitors. The organisation and broadcasting must be given top marks and I think it will be recorded in history as a memorable Olympic games of which we can be proud.

The Olympic Park looks very impressive and was completed in good time so cheers for the workmanship involved. The opening ceremony depicted everything British which I thought was professionally performed, however I was not too keen on the middle section depicting the music eras as I was left feeling a bit confused. The rising chimneys and the lifting of the Olympic rings made from 'molten metal' was incredible.

The British athletes have all performed very well with Jessica Ennis rightly earning her title as the face of the Olympics. It was a pleasure to watch the cycling events as this sport is available to anyone. I prefer to cycle than walk and I have my cycle 'gear' ready and waiting.






Apparently Bradley Wiggins originally hails from Wigan and still owns a house here so I might find myself on the same cycle path when I take a ride on my own bike!




One of my daughters is currently a volunteer at the hockey events and although it is hard work with long hours, she appears to be enjoying her time there. Another daughter watched the triathlon and was at the finish line to watch the Brownlee boys winning their gold and bronze medals.

My grandson is a member of the Liverpool swimming club which has coached many of our top swimmers in the past. As part of the 'Inspire a Generation', some of the Team GB Olympic swimmers are touring the country and are to visit the Liverpool club to swim with the members. I know I am biased but my grandson is a very good swimmer and he may be inspired to swim at the Olympics in 2020!

I have enjoyed these Olympic games as I have been able to see most of the events live throughout the day. Luckily the weather hasn't wreaked havoc on any of the events as we have had such a wet summer so far.  I hope that the London Games will be remembered for their success, efficiency and friendliness and that the ideal to inspire the next generation into sports of any kind, will happen, because lets not forget, we British invented most of them.

Well done Team GB

Out with the old, in with the new

One evening through the week, I went out to dinner with friends to celebrate a birthday and following the usual conversations about men, sex and children, the conversation turned to past times and how the era in which we grew up was vastly different to that of our grandchildren today. I grew up in the 50's and 60's, when life was basic compared to now.

I have three brothers and one sister and am the second youngest child. As a small child we lived in a 'two up-two down' terraced house with a toilet at the bottom of the yard. We had a tin bath in which, every Sunday, we bathed in front of the fire, and this bath was filled with a boiling kettle. Monday was wash day using  a tub with a separate wringer and I can remember the iron which was heated on a hot plate. Rooms had oilcloth flooring with a square carpet in the middle which was brushed daily with a large sweeping brush and pan and the front step and door entrance were scrubbed clean. I grew up on homemade cakes and pies, pea soup with ham shank, roast lamb Sunday dinners, soggy vegetables and fruit from the corner shop. We had comics to read every week and and Saturday was matinee afternoon at the cinema (the pictures). Our playtime was spent outdoors or in the local park, playing group games or with my girlfriends, playing with dolls and prams.

I remember the old black and white, box TV that we had when I was about 7 years old however, programmes only began at 5pm.





In my early teens we moved to a council estate in a three bedroom house, with a bathroom and indoor toilet and a garden at the front and back of the house. I attended a grammar school which was within walking distance and this education catapulted me into a different world from that of my siblings. The early sixties brought the rise of the Beatles, the Rolling Stones and pop music but I loved Motown music and felt very sophisticated. Very few people had a house telephone or a car, so arrangements to meet friends would be organised at school or before returning home at the end of an evening.

Although I had a happy childhood, I resist referring to bygone eras as the good old days because I think we now live in exciting times. When I see the giant strides made in technology and science in particular, in the last 50 years, I think I will now have to believe that pigs really can fly! My children urge me to write my 'memoirs', particularly about my early years and I hope to put pen to paper, or should I say, fingers to keyboard, some time before my memory fades.  

Yes, my grandchildren and children live in a different world which I hope they can embrace and enjoy to the full.