Lost and Found

I lost my mojo this week. The effect of situations crept up on me like unwelcome stalkers and invaded my space until I couldn't see clearly and lost my direction. Mojo is defined as a magical charm bag used in hoodoo, which is now used as a slang word for self-confidence, self-esteem or sex appeal. I lost my sex appeal a while ago and haven't really missed it but my self confidence and self esteem is a different matter - I wanted those back! I know why I lost my mojo, it was due to a combination of factors that finally outweighed the balance and tipped my life scales into a gloomy phase.

All due to a sad and bad news week. A thirty year old acquaintance who lost his young life to cancer, an eighty year old who gave up his life to suicide, the disgraceful saga of Jimmy Saville, family who are doing other things or who do not contact, the end of summer, or maybe simple biochemistry's ups and downs. It all added up and got the better of me.

Then I remembered the blog I wrote last week and thought I had better put it into practice. So I began to search for my mojo, it couldn't be far away, hidden somewhere, probably right under my nose. I know its a bit early but I thought about the American tradition of thanksgiving or more fitting to this time of year, as it is the end of October and Halloween, I thought about what was growing in my own pumpkin patch. I started to think about my blessings, the good things in life, my future aspirations and expectations. Those life scales began to tip back again as I remembered the positives in my life.

I found my mojo again, it was hidden under the autumn leaves amongst all my blessings. Yes, right under my nose (or rather my feet!). As autumn heralds the start of winter and hibernation, I can confidently be assured that the world continues in its cycle of new growth in the months to come. Life, with its ups and downs, its highs and lows, there are always positive things to cherish when you don't allow them to be hidden by the troubles that life, inevitably also brings.

It is not what is happening externally in the world that is important, but how we internalise situations and events in an attempt to make sense of, and live a meaningful life. That is essential in ensuring that the 'mojo' is never lost to negative influences.
Long live the mojo!

Mind Over Matter

I am fascinated by the power of the mind as it can and does affect everything in the body. There is so much about the brain that is yet to be identified and philosophers still debate whether thought exists inside the body or externally.

Many years ago, I studied health psychology and was introduced to the concept of healing using thoughts. Researchers have proved that people who have positive beliefs, have a state of mind that helps the body to maintain and repair itself. I read how visualisation and meditation have positive healing effects and patients in clinical trials respond to placebo treatment as if they are getting the real drug. The power of the mind can and does affect everything in the body, frequently producing chemical changes that were believed to be only possible through the use of  powerful drugs. Optimists recover better. Long before cognitive behaviour therapy was a treatment of choice, I would help people who attended my stress groups, to retrain their thinking by discussing the effect of positive thinking, resulting in positive outcomes. 

A positive state of mind is linked to all the major religions. Christianity has good and evil concepts, eastern religions are based on positive and negative energies and the Chakras are believed to be energy centres for wellbeing. All these beliefs have the same goal, to gain wellbeing or a state of paradise. In a study of 50 people with advanced lung cancer, those judged to have high "spiritual faith" responded better to chemotherapy and survived longer. The universe began as a thought in the mind of God, those thoughts became words, those words became creation. In the New Testament it states that if you have faith, you can move a mountain.

In years or centuries to come, we will no doubt be educated to use our mind and thoughts with more precision. To gain incredible insights and awareness. I do not envisage that the drug companies will fund this research though!

Maybe, if I begin to meditate and visualise daily, I can rid my face of those advancing wrinkles instead of resorting to plastic surgery. I could ultimately patent the technique and make a fortune. Now that is positive thinking!!

No Change For Females

 

Its official, I’m one of the older generation now as my daytime companion is radio 4! If John Humphries from the early morning ‘Today’ programme tells me the sky is green, I would probably believe him. Woman’s Hour keeps me informed and when I need background noise, the chatter from the radio is ideal. Perhaps it is true that you do turn into your mother because I remember the equivalent to radio 4 being a feature in my teen years as my parents tuned in to the transistor radio. Daughter beware, as she tells me she has migrated from radio 1 to radio 2!

Recently I was listening to radio and TV items about post natal depression, with the aim to educate, increase awareness and concerns. I had quite a serious PND following the birth of my first child over 40 years ago and I am dismayed to hear that relatively little has changed in either awareness, attitudes or treatments.

My own story mirrors those of the mothers who were interviewed in that I had uncontrollable thoughts about injuring my baby. Today there are 1 in 10 mothers who suffer from PND and in all females, 1 in 4 will have some kind of mental illness in their lives. Quite high statistics and not much difference in 40 years. All the mothers interviewed had not voiced their feelings for months as they feared the associated stigma and were concerned that their child would be removed. My intrusive fearful thoughts started the day after my baby was born and I to was so frightened that I told no one and three months went by before I told my husband.

The treatment and medication that I was given are the same today as they were all those years ago and there continues to be an associated stigma. How sad that little has changed, even though there have been major medical advances over the years. If 1 in 4 females will have some kind of mental illness in their lives, that equates to a lot of suffering and high costs, both personal and for the NHS. I recovered with the support of my husband and family but it was five years before I felt comfortable and secure enough to discuss my experience with outsiders. I had an article published by a Mother and Baby magazine about my experience and although that was written in 1977, mothers on the radio interviews could write the same today. How sad. In some areas there are few changes but I hope that in female mental health, there will be more improvements in the next forty years. 

I am so pleased that some things have not changed as I still have the support of my husband and family, of which I am very thankful. One thing that has changed considerably is technology, as I now listen to my radio, not on a transistor but on my ipod sat in its dock.

Shades of Autumn

Autumn has arrived, the leaves are turning into lovely shades of brown and yellow and the nights are getting longer. I can't believe it is now 12 months since I retired.

Had some wonderful news yesterday as my son has been offered his first job since leaving university. When I hear of the millions of young people who are unemployed, I thank God for his opportunity. If I compare the circumstances of those young people who are beginning a career today, to the time when I started my first employment as a cadet nurse in 1969, there are little similarities. In the late 1960's I was easily able to choose my employment, unemployment was a thing of choice with my peers. Now I hear of so many of our young people who desperately want to work but have little opportunity, even if they have a degree. I worked for the same employer for 33 years whereas now, people are no longer committed to lifelong careers but may change careers a few times. I am so relieved that I am now receiving my pension and am not at the beginning of my working life, but I do worry about the prospects for my children in having a decent retirement. They will probably never be able to retire either due to inadequate pensions or government rulings.


As autumn displays its colours, the shops are beginning to stock their Christmas items and my thoughts turn to making Christmas gifts to sell. I have already made two sets of Christmas place mats and matching coasters.  I have a list of ideas and am currently making a Father Christmas soft toy doll. Please feel free to look in my online shop at www.http://folksy.com/shops/essell

 So as I look back over the last twelve months, I feel content in my own 'autumn' years and I look at my four grown up children and they all take my breath away with pride and love.
 Looking forward to the next twelve months.